Looking Inwards

I'm trying to adopt a more positive perspective on things. I think the source of ninety-five percent. No. Maybe 80? No. 90% of my problems come from my perspectives. 

I recently noticed that I take things very personally, at times too personally. I felt like shit when someone says something and make it too real in my own head. 

It's almost like every little interaction becomes a voice on who I am. A joke isn't just a joke. Someone being annoyed isn't just someone having a bad day. Every little thing becomes another referendum on my worth.

Sometimes the teasing feels a little too real. But with one quick attitude adjustment, all that goes away. Why do their words affect me so much? Whatever. 

And that's it. That's all it takes. The only difference between me feeling up or down is whether I believe my own thoughts about myself are more important. 

And it's easier said than done. If it were, I wouldn't need to spend $150 a week on therapy. 

But why isn't it easier than just that? I've already acknowledged it. Shouldn't that just be it? 

I think so. But I keep coming up with excuses. That's how I was taught growing up. That's all I know. How to people please. 

Location: Philadelphia, PA, USA

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