Mourning Dove

The trees have bloomed, people are outside (and happy), and there's life all over! I particularly enjoy seeing the birds again and all the various plants. Recently, a mourning dove has been seeking refuge near my bedroom window and wakes me with a beautiful song each morning. I haven't heard their calls lately, but I hope they're doing well. 

I think there's a metaphor there... I was mourning a loss of someone I was in love with (we've just parted indefinitely for now...), and I finally got over them. Something like that; there's a reason I'm in tech and not in the arts.

On my end, I've been doing so much better recently. Both mentally and physically. I think the seasonal depression is finally over, and I'm no longer moping about. This past winter has yielded a lot of personal growth and life experiences, and to be honest, I didn't think I was capable of feeling such emotions. To sum up this past winter and most of my life, honestly, I was in a deep place of denial and unwelcomeness in my own mind, and I finally came out on the other side, accepting myself. It wasn't a graceful exit, but I ultimately survived and didn't give up.

I woke up this morning with one of the worst (seasonal) allergy attacks of my life. I jolted up, not being able to breathe, and continued into raging fits of sneezes. I've had the flu and Covid multiple times before, but this one hour window was one of the worst. Despite this, I'll take being able to go outside and bask in the beautiful sunlight any day.

I still find myself thinking about the mourning dove. I haven't heard their calls recently, but I think it left right before I was finally okay. As I reflect back, it's bittersweet. I liked having the company, but it didn't linger or overstay. If it had stayed even a week longer, I think I would've grown too fond of it.

It stayed the perfect amount of time to keep me company.

Location: Philadelphia, PA, USA

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